


Losing Sight

by LadyCosmos



Category: Free!
Genre: I needed to see your face, M/M, brief angst, entry, makoharu fesitval
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-17
Updated: 2014-02-17
Packaged: 2018-01-12 18:42:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1195503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyCosmos/pseuds/LadyCosmos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the night of the storm, Haru can’t let Makoto out of his sight; he’s too afraid of what might happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Losing Sight

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much to tetsurokurou for being my beta and putting up with me

The second day of their training camp was the longest, most stressful day of Haru’s life.

After waking up on the beach to an irritated Gou, the boys had to run through another full day of drills and swimming in the ocean.  Haru had tried to protest and insist on a land regiment for the day, but there had been no budging the schedule.  Makoto consistently insisted he was fine throughout the day and, indeed, other than some trouble breathing during the first lap, Makoto had been perfectly fine throughout the day.  Not once did Haru notice any fear in his actions or fake smiles.

But every time Haru lost sight of Makoto, every time a roll or wave in the water separated them, Haru felt panic tighten his chest and fear grip his stomach.  If Makoto coughed after accidentally gulping in seawater, Haru’s heart would stop and his vision tunnel.  Makoto would wave him off, eyes soft with understanding, but it only made Haru more persistent.

During lunch, Haru hovered by Makoto’s side, making sure he was always between his friend and the ocean.  If Makoto disappeared to check his phone, Haru never took his attention away from the last place he saw the other boy.  His nerves were strung tight, body humming with tension until Makoto returned to his side safe and sound.  When the sun finally went down and practice drew to an end, Haru had never felt so physically and emotionally drained.

Haru couldn’t even bring himself to protest when there was no mackerel for dinner.  He had eaten silently, trying to avoid Makoto’s eyes but knowing he would still be read.  Although Makoto would never pity him, Haru didn’t want to confront his understanding.

“Ah…I think we should call it a night early.” He heard Makoto speak over his head to the rest of the team. “Today’s been pretty rough and we could use the extra rest.”

“No fair, Mako-chan!  We were just getting started!  I even got marshmallows for us to roast,” Nagisa whined, holding a bag of large, fluffy marshmallows in front of him to bolster his argument.  Haru could feel Makoto shake his head and was grateful that his friend was being adamant this time.

“Maybe tomorrow night, Nagisa.  I think we’re all pretty tired after yesterday as well.” Nagisa quieted noticably and made no attempt to argue further.  A strained silence hung over the boys as Kou and Ama-sensei gave a few last remarks about the next day before leaving.

The sun dipped below the horizon and painted the ocean a beautiful golden red that made Haru a little sick.  While it made the water look calm and peaceful, all Haru could think about was how close the color resembled the shirt Makoto had been wearing yesterday.  It made Haru uncomfortable to think about it, a cold sweat breaking out down his back as he remembered how cold and lifeless Makoto had been when he’d pulled him out of the water.

“Let’s head to bed, shall we?” Makoto spoke up, gently ushering the others off the beach.

As they slowly made their way back to the tents, Haru reached out and grabbed Makoto’s shirt, pulling him back slightly.

“Haru?” Makoto asked, his head cocked to the side questioningly.  Clutching the shirt tighter, Haru turned his head away.

“I’m staying with Makoto tonight.” Haru didn’t need to look up to see the tender smile on Makoto’s face or the relief in his gaze.

“Of course,” was all he said. 

As they separated and headed to their respective tents, Makoto gently pulled Nagisa aside.  Whatever Makoto said was hidden as he kept his back turned to Haru.  Nagisa seemed about to protest but, after glancing toward Haru and seeing something, he changed his mind and smiled wide as he ran and grabbed Rei’s arm, spinning them both around a few times.

“Rei-chan, don’t be indecent with me tonight.  We need to remain true to our duties and only train for swimming!”

“Nagisa-kun!  Don’t say such weird things,” Rei cried as he was pulled into his tent.  A loud laugh followed by a muffled _Don’t laugh at me!_ floated across the beach.  Makoto chuckled, covering his mouth with the back of his hand as he watched the two disappear. 

They stood on the beach awhile longer, Makoto gazing out over the water and Haru watching Makoto intently.  Haru’s stomach twisted uncomfortably as he watched the waves lick the sand closer and closer to Makoto’s feet.  His fingers twitched to grab Makoto and pull him safely inside the tent - block the water from reaching him again.

It was an odd sensation, to fear the water.

Finally, Makoto turned and, with a smile small, lead Haru into the tent.  It was hot and muggy inside from the day’s heat, but Haru couldn’t help but imagine there was a strange tension in the air as well.  Makoto chattered aimlessly about the day’s events, what his family must be doing, how the team was improving but, underneath the words, Haru could sense his unease.

“Haru, are you going to stay up longer?”  Makoto asked as he slipped under his covers.  For a second, all Haru could see was Makoto lying lifelessly on the sand.  He shook his head to clear the image and quickly slipped into his own bed, turning away from Makoto’s gaze.

“Good night, Haru.”

“Good night.”

Unfortunately, for Haru, it didn’t remain a good night for very long.  The nightmares started early.

In the first one, he never woke up to find Makoto and Rei in the ocean.  Instead, they woke up the morning after to find their friends gone but didn’t look for them.  The day continued the same as it had, continual laps around the islands with only a break for lunch.  Only no one seemed to care that Makoto and Rei were missing.

The second dream felt like a continuation of the first but only Makoto was missing.  The days after training felt different; as though everything except Haru had tilted ninety degrees.  Something was wrong but every time Haru thought he had grasped it, his attention was pulled elsewhere.  As Haru finished his race, he reached out for the hand that was always there but found nothing.  Confused, he asked Nagisa why ______ wasn’t there to pull him out.  Nagisa laughed and asked who _______ was; they never knew someone with that name.  Scared, Haru raced around the pool screaming for ______ but wasn’t sure who he was looking for.

The third dream was the worst.  He could see Makoto in the water, could almost reach him.  But every time he got close enough to grab hold of Makoto’s hand or arm, the water was there to separate them with a crashing wave or a slight roll.  He tried harder, swam faster, but could never reach Makoto.  He was always pushed or pulled away by the water; close enough to watch as Makoto drowned but never able to touch him. 

Haru awoke with a muffled cry, heart pounding so loudly he feared he’d wake Makoto.

 _Makoto!_ his mind cried with irrational fear.  His chest felt tight and his hands trembled as he sat up, turning to his best friend.  It was still dark out, making it difficult for Haru to see more than the lump that Makoto created in the shadows.

Gripped with a paralyzing fear, Haru stared at his friend’s side of the tent, unable to make himself move.  A dark voice in the back on his mind questioned whether Makoto might have died while they had slept.  Maybe he hadn’t been fine and something was waiting to take him.  What if the water had damaged his lungs and it had just taken until now for Makoto to die?  What if Makoto had lied and pushed himself for everyone else?  What if Makoto died when he wasn’t looking?  When he wasn’t ready?

Suddenly, Haru was filled with an overwhelming need to see Makoto’s face; to hear his heart beating and hold his hand.  Leaning forward on shaking arms, Haru slowly moved closer until his face hovered over Makoto’s.  Seeing the slight rise and fall of his chest helped ease some of the terror Haru still harbored, but it wasn’t enough.

Mimicking his motions from the night before, Haru laid his head against Makoto’s chest and closed his eyes to listen for the solid _thump thump_ of his heart.  He laid there for a few moments just listening to Makoto’s heart and to reassure himself that everything was okay.  Makoto was still alive. He wasn’t going to be leaving without Haru knowing.

Haru wasn’t sure how long he laid against Makoto’s chest when Makoto began to stir beneath him.  He pulled back quickly to look at Makoto’s face and a memory flashed through his mind.   His breath caught in his throat making his head feel light and the ground begin to tilt.  Green eyes slowly blinked and focused on Haru, a crease of confusion between them as Makoto struggled to wake up.

“Haru?” he asked sleepily, a yawn stretching his jaw. “Is something wrong?”

Under his friend’s drowsy gaze, Haru felt his fear melt away.  It was an odd sensation, the sense of peace he received from seeing Makoto’s face.  Realization dawned on him as a memory surfaced from long ago.  Breathing easily once more, Haru shook his head.

“Yeah, but I guess seeing your face took care of it.” He didn’t know why he said it, those words from long ago that didn’t make any sense then.  Makoto’s face brightened with realization and he smiled knowingly up at Haru.

Haru suddenly felt light and very tired as the remaining tension drained away.  Laying down on his bed, he tentatively reached out to gently grab the sleeve of Makoto’s shirt.  He smiled into his pillow as Makoto took hold of his hand.

“I’m not going anywhere, Haru.  I’ll always be by your side.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments would be greatly appreciated.


End file.
